Democracy for Vancouver

This morning, the preznit got up in a browbeating mood, and decided to bang the drum for telecom immunity right in the House’s ears.

First, a little fearmongering to break the ice:

At this moment, somewhere in the world, terrorists are planning new attacks on our country. Their goal is to bring destruction to our shores that will make September the 11th pale by comparison. To carry out their plans, they must communicate with each other, they must recruit operatives, and they must share information.

Throw in a bit of wheedling blackmail: We could protect all of you from the boogie man, if Congress would only give us the tools.

The lives of countless Americans depend on our ability to monitor these communications. Our intelligence professionals must be able to find out who the terrorists are talking to, what they are saying, and what they’re planning.

Now, time to praise the Vichy Senate, who bent over so obligingly:

I am pleased that last night, Senators approved new legislation that will ensure our intelligence professionals have the tools they need to make us safer… The Senate bill also provides fair and just liability protections for companies that did the right thing and assisted in defending America after the attacks of September the 11th.

And, finally, roll out the lies:

In order to be able to discover enemy — the enemy’s plans, we need the cooperation of telecommunication companies. If these companies are subjected to lawsuits that could cost them billions of dollars, they won’t participate; they won’t help us; they won’t help protect America.

That’s very funny, because only Qwest had any problem with your warrantless scheme beforehand, and the rest gave you everything you wanted, without any legal protection whatsoever!

The House’s failure to pass the bipartisan Senate bill would jeopardize the security of our citizens.

LIE.

[W]ithout this law, our ability to prevent new attacks will be weakened. And it will become harder for us to uncover terrorist plots.

LIE.

It is time for Congress to ensure the flow of vital intelligence is not disrupted.

You want to ensure the “flow of vital information is not disrupted,” shithead? THEN GET YOURSELF A GODDAMN WARRANT!

It is time for Congress to pass a law that provides a long-term foundation to protect our country.

They already did - why don’t you read the original text of the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act, numbnuts?

Wake me up when it’s 2009 - I can’t take much more of this asshole.